Let the tears be shed. Cry as much as you can. Do it at a time without stretching and not alluring to his depression. Let out steam, will drop the veil of anger, aggression, arrogance, poison-green with anger. You need to calm down, to begin to think and then to act.
Did you know that spouse you cheated or is cheating. Make sure in this as much as can be possible. Try to find out who this woman is, what she represents. How long is this novel, how serious he is if he knows about the booze the husband of someone of our mutual friends – find the answers to these questions.
Now it's time to dig in yourself. Think, what is the reason for infidelity: a crisis of family life, the result of long-faded feelings, accumulated domestic or financial problems, lack of attention on your part, and the like. Try to understand that was the impetus for your spouse that he started a relationship on the side.
Talk to your husband. Do not cry, do not throw accusations and vases at the same time. Its version, you have already made (mentally), now listen to his opinion. Do not press on the wife, calmly get to the truth no matter how bitter it was.
Decide for yourself what you more: to keep the family together and to build relationships or to send a loved one far away. If you close the second option, then, without hesitation, request your spouse to collect their things and vacate the area. You will be able to forgive him when he leaves eventually. The faster on your way to meet a new Prince on a white horse, the easier it is to forgive a past betrayal. You will perceive the past as a necessary step for a brighter future. Still say thank you to someone who once betrayed you.
If you believe that your family must give another chance, then do. Fight, his aggression into a fist, sending the negative energy to a good cause, of action. Remember all the things that attracted your spouse, when you just started Dating. Point full potential to create a "new you", better than before thousands of times. Improve yourself, become ideal not only for wife but also for potential suitors. Flirt lift your mood and give nourishment to work in the same direction.
Remember the betrayal of themselves and remind the spouse. The next time your suspicion and the desire to tighten the collar of a spouse, take a break, relax and smile. Chase away such thoughts.
Make a man to achieve your location. Sexual relations will have to recover the pieces, you may they will not be very pleasant for some time. The best advice: make love when you want, not the spouse. The man must try to seduce you, just like the very first time. The shadow of the third wheel in bed will remind about the incident until, until you established a basic trust.
Advice 2: How to forgive betrayal
Betrayal is a human offense, which only at the mere mention of many people causes anger and fear. The person who was confronted with meanness, leaves the trust, without which it is difficult to live. It is therefore necessary to be able to forgive. Yes, it's complicated. But, you forgive the betrayal, you gain the freedom and peace in your soul.
Betrayal: how to live?
From birth a person is looking for a reliable back and a shoulder to always lean on. In the first 2 years of life is the mother, then after meeting with the society of friends, growing up is the second half. Someone is good, someone bad. But sooner or later almost every man standing in front of a mirror, notices there is nothing but emptiness and disappointment of betrayal. And the worst thing that a close friend turned traitor.
After you calm down, you will understand how to behave with the person who violated your trust.
The most frequently asked questions after the betrayal and dastardly act on the part of a loved one is:
"How did it happen?";
"What should we do?";
- "How to behave?";
- "How to live after such a shock?"
Unfortunately, to anticipate the betrayal most often impossible. It happens unexpectedly and at a time when he was not expecting. So the question "how did it happen?" difficult to find a logical answer. It's just the way human life, and accept what is necessary.
The question "what to do?" in such a stressful situation pushes "dedicated" person to rash acts. First, he blames only himself, then it covers a wave of anger at the traitor, and then comes depression. Actions in the doldrums confuse, and before the complexity of the situation, and eventually "hurt" at the same time begins to beg and to curse, to beg forgiveness and blame. That is why the best answer to this question is to try to calm down.
As for the question "How to live on after such a shock?", you should let the situation go. Mastering his emotions, having realized the inevitability of what is happening, you need to forgive and let go. Only forgiving, you will find again the faith and the right to continue a happy life.
How to forgive betrayal: advice
After you have calmed down, accept betrayal as a good lesson for the future. It is not necessary to count on a loved one, try in the future to resolve their questions and tell all my secrets. Take a friend-traitor as a weak person, because only weak people do thoughtless, and wrong-doing. Forgive him as a weak personality. Based on the knowledge of psychology, man is much easier to forgive weak than evil.
Depending on the extent of the betrayal, it can be regarded as a bug, in which both sides are to blame. So it's good to analyze the whole situation without unnecessary emotions make the appropriate conclusions.
If the betrayal has the highest severity and is unforgivable, do not revenge! Revenge will not help. Remains forgiveness. But how do you forgive the unforgivable? To do this you need to understand what contributed to this man to treachery and what is to your merit. Try to understand, forgive and release to God.
Remember that all the difficulties in our head. Nothing is impossible, the main thing - time to realize this and act!
As for the mistress of your husband here it will be useful to help friends. Girl with the cheating solidarity, so happy to help to ward off the predator from the "busy male."
If you decide to forgive a betrayal, try not to discuss the confusion with common friends, relatives and family. This is unnecessary talk and gossip, which can fuel to the fire to pour. Can't keep to yourself, trust those who you are truly close.